She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
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