After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
I have fence marks all over my body
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Randomize
