I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
I'm eating cold pizza from work and drinking beer from a wine glass trying to decide if I want to shower or just rub one out and go to sleep. How have I ever gotten laid?
Because you're really hot before taking the time to actually get to know you.
Randomize
