I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
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