grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
Randomize
