In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
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