every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
