I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
"it" just moved
Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
How's work?
Spinning.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
Randomize
