he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
Randomize
