The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
What a dumb baby whore.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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