Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
I Just paid off the bartender to help me convince this chic my roommate's gay. This is the best cockblock ever.
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
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