Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(734): View more from Michigan

I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.

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(817): View more from Texas

Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...

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(520): View more from Arizona

you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.

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(617): View more from Massachusetts

You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.

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(714): View more from California

Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.

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(651): View more from Minnesota

When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?

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(904): View more from Florida

That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.

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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.

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(816): View more from Missouri

Don't get into any trouble on your trip

(314): View more from Missouri

The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds

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