Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
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