The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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