her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
he just looked at me and whispered "these are my sea lions. my sea lions." and then went back to licking the mirror
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
Randomize
