is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Randomize
