Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
I think pants incapable of making pants work
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Randomize