dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
Randomize