Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
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