how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
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