All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
apparently i ate an entire bag of goldfish, kissed some guy with a girlfriend who now wants to kill me, made my sister sleep in my bed with me while i wore no pants, and told my whole family i am pregnant with jonny's devil baby...never drinking again
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
Randomize
