I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
She's just so happy...and so naked.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
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