No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Randomize
