it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize
