We won't sleep together?
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
Randomize