I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
my poor anus
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
Randomize