My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
Randomize
