how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize
