You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
Randomize
