I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
Randomize
