Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
I'm too hungover for some lady to talk to me about potatoes
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
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