I blacked out in 45 minutes and woke up with a missed call from someone I saved in my phone as the karate kid.
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
Randomize
