Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
On my way home I saw a car that had "MOVE OVER PLZ" emblazoned across the windshield backwards, so people could see it in their rearview mirror
If I ever drive for Lyft or Uber I'm definitely gonna do that
Randomize
