So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
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