I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize
