so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
