we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
