seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
Randomize