Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
You may now shotgun with the bride
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
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