The cop didn't care that I was peeing on the wall of my dorm building... All he said was, "come on, it's 9am."
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
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