Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
dude, i look like john mccains neck right now
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize
