She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
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