We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
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