ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
Randomize
