Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
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