Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
Wedding update: no alcohol, 75% of people have left, no one is dancing, no single groomsmen, and it's 5:30. I'm going the fuck home to drink by myself.
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
sex in a hospital.. check
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
