You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Randomize
