i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
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