Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
Randomize
