like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
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